The key to developing deeper, more meaningful friendships
People crave connection. We all want to feel like we matter, that we’re a part of something larger than ourselves. And the best way to do that is through relationships—deep, meaningful relationships in which we can be vulnerable and open up to someone else.
But establishing those kinds of relationships can be difficult. It takes time and effort to get to know someone, and even more time and effort to let them into our innermost circle. But it’s worth it, because those are the relationships that bring us the most happiness and fulfillment in life.
There’s no feeling quite like the one you get when a friend or loved one reaches out to you in a time of need. You can feel it deep down in your bones: they trust you enough to share their struggles and experiences with you. And, as a result, you’re given the chance to deepen your relationship and strengthen your bond together.
It doesn’t have to take a crisis for that kind of thing to happen though. All relationships need moments to grow, and even the simplest interactions between you and a friend can be those moments if you know what to look for.
Connection is built on understanding. A relationship is only as strong as the amount of empathy two people have for each other, so always strive to listen—really listen—to another person when they talk about themselves or their experiences. Validation is another part of being a good friend, so you have to let them know that what they’re saying is important and meaningful to you.
One great way to establish a connection is through vulnerability . It allows a person to be seen for who they really are, not just how they want the world to see them. It’s a big step, opening yourself up to someone else, but the more you do it with different people, the better you get at being comfortable in your own skin. That comfort makes for stronger relationships in the long run—as long as you don’t take things too personally when they open up to you.
Of course, there are going to be times when a person is standoff-ish or seems to reject you. It’s never pleasant, but this doesn’t mean that the relationship isn’t one worth pursuing. In fact, it could actually be the other way around: they may want to get closer but feel like they aren’t allowed to because of how shy they are or because of their own insecurities. When you feel like someone is pushing you away, it can be hard not to take it personally , but the best thing to do is try and see things from their perspective instead. Understanding them gives you more insight into what they might be going through and what their feelings might be, which will make it that much easier to develop a closer connection with them.
Connection takes time—and it’s difficult for others to open themselves up right away. But if you keep your eyes and ears open for opportunities to connect with another person, eventually something will click and they’ll be more comfortable sharing their experiences with you. It could happen over a game of chess or it could happen after they’ve had a few too many drinks, but it will happen eventually if you just keep your mind open and your heart ready to meet them halfway. Connection is all about giving someone the chance to be themselves around you without judgment. If you give that to them, then take your time and let them in, the rewards will be surprising.
You’ll find that once you do get closer to someone; there are things about themselves they feel comfortable sharing only with you. And if you prove to be a trustworthy friend who really stuck by them through the roughest times of their life, they’ll feel more inclined to stick by you through some of your roughest times as well. They’ll be on the front lines ready to fight for you and do whatever it takes to help you win. Connection is a two-way street that becomes easier with each step on the journey together.
Connection is key to any and all relationships. It's what allows us to understand each other, share experiences, and develop a deeper bond. While it may take time and effort to build a connection with someone, the rewards are always worth it in the end. Keep your eyes and ears open for opportunities to connect, be understanding and accepting of them when they do open up to you, and never give up on forging those meaningful connections with others.
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